Friday, February 13, 2009

Paging Mr. Whipple

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Paging Mr. Whipple
I told myself I needed a topic for my blog. (Yes, I talk to myself.) I sat in the little closet connected to the "wash room" (the one with the throne), contemplated and rejected several ideas. Then I noticed it. The roll of toilet paper. It was new. And I hadn't put it there.
I closed my eyes, then cautiously opened one. The roll was still there. Dear Hubby had changed the roll of TP without being asked, told or prodded. Elation surged through me. (That's writer talk for "I was totally shocked!")
My hand trembled as I reached to inspect the quilted lily-white cloud. Downy softness tickled my fingertips. I wanted to hug Mr. Whipple and the urge to squeeze took on new meaning.
I tugged at the roll. Something was wrong. My gratitude ambled toward the door and strolled away. The toilet paper had been placed on the holder improperly. The cruddy, thin, one-ply wonder unrolled from the back.
Many couples, families and former friends have debated over the proper way to place toilet paper on the holder. Please pay attention and I will clarify the issue.

Not only have studies shown that there is less probability of spreading germs with the paper in the correct position, but the obvious designs on various rolls would suggest the manufacturer's intent. In a recent poll conducted online 1,543 people voted that the edge of the roll should pull from the front while only 500 uneducated simpletons thought it should unroll from the back. (I ask that the 500 please not identify themselves.)
Once the huffs and puffs I had emitted into the air cleared, a strange and unfamiliar sensation washed over me. Could I be wrong? (Not about the way the toilet paper "should" be. I know I'm right on that one, but. . .) Did it really matter if hubby hung the TP incorrectly? I wasn't inconvenienced by a lack of the necessary item at an inappropriate time. Wasn't that the whole point of the roll and holder: to provide expediency and practicality in a time of need.
This started me thinking of other areas where I sometimes let "little" matters steer my attitude. The person in front of me on the freeway moving too slow. The drive-thru forgetting ketchup to go with the fries. The tele-marketer that interrupts the final moments of a made-for-TV movie. The sun pausing to rest behind the clouds.
Little things that shouldn't become big things. But somehow, sometimes, some way . . .they do. Things that, when we have all eternity to enjoy being in the presence of Jesus, will not matter. Philippians 2:5 reads, "Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus." (NIV) When we put things in perspective, (like toilet paper and tele-marketers) we give God a chance to help us change and grow in our attitude and in our spirit.
So I say "thank-you" to my sweet husband, who thought enough of me to not only change the toilet paper roll, but become a partner with God in making me all that He wants me to be.


  1. I think we have all been there. Really give me something to think about

  2. I'm cracking up! Yes, you are a writer. Anyone that can get inspiration from a roll of TP is golden! haha